Learning lessons as an adult
After not riding bikes since probably high school, I recently got a new bike. One month in, I’ve got a number of scrapes and bruises on my body and my ego.
I’ve never been confident on a bicycle. As a kid, we were limited to riding loops on our fixed gear children’s bike in the small public park nearby. So trying to learn to ride a new bike, which is a road bike, now as an adult, is very slow going. Not to mention, I’m also a tiny bit too short to stand over my bike comfortably.
This past weekend on the way to my parents’ home, I had a minor crash when there were two turns from one section of a bike path to another section of bike path. I was going too quickly behind someone who was way more confident than I. So I made the first turn but slightly missed the second, and was too slow on the brakes on my drop handlebars. I got slammed into a concrete barrier, which hit my throat and scraped my chin. Other than that, I jammed my right thumb and have some scrapes on my knuckles on my right hand. Not much other damage to me or my bike.
I felt thankful to the people who stopped to ask if I was alright. It must have looked pretty bad. One woman even said to me if it were her she’d be sitting on the ground to recover a lot longer.
But I also felt ashamed at what happened. I felt embarrassed that I couldn’t brake in time. My family was worried, but I didn’t want them to and I just felt like forgetting it happened and moving on.
It turned out that I needed a tool back at my place so I walked to go get it. On the way back, I walked past a playground and saw some teenagers practicing kick-flips on a skateboard. I thought to myself, “There’s no way that they go into that thinking they won’t get hurt.”
And that should be true for me too. I learned the basics of riding a bike when I was a kid, but I was nowhere near done learning. Granted, I will be happy to just have the confidence to make turns regularly and maybe ride in the streets of New York. No tricks for me. But I can’t expect that I won’t get a few scrapes while I’m getting there.
Now, I feel glad that it wasn’t worse. I’m happy that no one else was involved and thus hurt in the process. My bike was easily fixed up and I don’t have any broken bones.
With my bike riding, I have to learn how to use these new brakes better. I have to slow down in areas where I feel unsure.
In my regular life, I could probably do all of those same things, too.
I’m about two years into journalism and I recently found out I didn’t get chosen for a job I really wanted. I felt deflated, because it would have been thrilling to get to work there. I thought for sure, this would be my big break, my big opportunity. But it wasn’t meant to be, and I am ok with that.
People giving advice to newcomers in journalism say that we shouldn’t be looking for shortcuts in our careers. I’ve heard this at a few talks at events or conferences already. I know the basics of journalism now and I feel like I’ve improved tremendously as a writer, but I still only have two years of experience in the industry.
So I’ve had to think more about what specific goals I can set for myself while I’m growing and learning. For biking, I will practice and incrementally increase the length of my rides. The lofty idea of going on trips to places to do long bike rides has crossed my mind. People I’ve known have done trips like these in South America and elsewhere. It sounds amazing, but at least a few years down the road for me in terms of achievability.
Travel in general is far from a possibility right now because of COVID-19. I have thought about visiting several friends who have babies whom I would like to meet, but I won’t be able to do that until 2021 at the earliest. But it’s also quite possible that I don’t travel next year at all, so I’ll do what I can to be a part of their lives remotely.
For life, I will have to set aside career goals that are too big too soon and do what I can with the opportunities I have. I’m lucky to have a job and an income right now when so many people have lost their jobs.
I hope you are all safe and healthy. Take care!
Tumbling in the waves of Sri Lanka
Note: I entered a version of this story to the World Nomad’s travel writing competition in 2017. It’s been adapted and expanded on here. I’m hoping to publish more stories like this in the future. Share your thoughts in the comments!
Sometimes you have to just laugh at yourself. And that’s what I did. Snorting seawater out of my nose, I laughed at myself, deeply and heartily.
Gentrification is turning me into a bitter old lady
I never thought it would come to this.
Let me explain. It’s not that I look at teenagers and say “darn kids these days,” although sometimes I do think it. It mostly has to do with what is going on in my old hood in New York City. I’ve been living abroad for the past 4 years, and in that time, some things have changed.
This is turning me into something I didn’t think I would become (at least not this soon): a bitter old lady.
When you are ready for a trip to end
I got back onto United States soil 2 days ago, and I’m happy to be back despite all of the craziness of Trump. I was ready to be home again, and I was ready to be with family again. Really, I was ready for my trip to end, and I don’t feel bad about that.
It wasn’t that my trip was going badly. On the contrary, my trip was going as well as I could have hoped! I wasn’t running out of money, and I wasn’t getting tired of seeing new places. Wonder was still at least somewhat abundant, although I was starting to feel a little lackluster about some aspects of travel.
Me at the Royal Botanical Gardens in Peradeniya, Sri Lanka
The gap between nationality and ethnicity
We had just seen all of Bangkok together at a fancy rooftop bar in a hotel downtown. Some of us got drinks, but I didn’t as I mostly just wanted the view and didn’t feel like overpaying for crappy imported beer or a fancy cocktail. Now we were in Bangkok’s Chinatown, seeking some street eats for the evening. The tables were in rows all the way down the street.
He came up to me and thanked me so graciously that I was taken aback. This has never happened before. Continue Reading
Being an auntie from abroad
I’m going to be an aunt times two! Whoa!
My sister is about 3 months along with baby number 2! She is due in March 2016. This means I’ll have to plan a trip to go home to New York around that time. But this also means another little person is going to be in the back of my mind, nagging me to go home more often.
This is a recent photo of me and my nephew in New York:
Me and L on a walk
Growth through travel
The past few years have really flown by. I feel like I’ve changed as a person, and as a writer too. Why travel blog? So I can follow what I’ve seen and how I’ve changed over the years!
How I’ve changed as a person
What I love about travel is that you challenge yourself. You can challenge your beliefs of what the world is like, what other people are like, and who you are. I’ve grown the most through traveling, and much of this has been because I’ve gotten to know myself better. Instead of floating through life living on a routine, travel has broken it up by giving me new experiences, exposing me to new cultures, and making new friends. It’s also forced me to think about what is important to me.
I’ve learned that I love being around different languages, and that I can be braver than I thought I could be.
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Coffee at Rocket cafe in Bangkok Bangkok in contrasts
Bangkok is changing very rapidly, just like any other major city in Asia. The interesting thing about Bangkok is that you’ll find areas that have become something entirely cosmopolitan overnight next to others that aren’t changing at the same rate (or at all).
Two sides, same coin
Two sides of a lightrail train station in central Bangkok
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Sure I’m a little racist, but am I THAT racist?
Everyone’s a little bit racist, it’s just the way things happen to turn out in this world. But how little is that bit of me that is racist? Is it bigger than I like to think it is? Am I kidding myself that it is as small as I want others to think it is?
This came up when a few weeks ago I saw a childhood friend in New York City post something about her boyfriend who had passed away a year ago. My first thought was maybe he was shot.
Nope. It was cancer and an infection.
This thought came up so quickly and naturally, that it caught me by surprise. I felt ashamed that my immediate and uncensored thought was that he was involved with gangs or crime somehow and was shot. Am I really that racist? It’s a weird and scary realization to come to. What if I’m not as open minded as I think I am? What if I’m really not as good a person as I want to be?
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Hug deprived in Singapore
Me and my roomie hugging at our ’60s party
Hugs are great! Give me hugs!!
More hugs please!
One thing I wish was different about Singapore is that friends hugged each other more often. This is just part of Singapore culture. When I went back to the USA for 3 months earlier this year, I really liked hugging friends again, either when we first saw each other or when we’re parting ways. It isn’t a big deal, but no one does that in Singapore.
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Hey, I'm Chewy! I'm a science journalist currently living in New York. I'm an introvert who likes to see new things and learn. Here I write about my travels and musings about food, places and cultures. Check out my photos, reviews, and random thoughts!